Whatever busyness was around me, was immaterial. I was comfortably cosy in my little bubble on this Sunday afternoon. There was no point in worrying about the week to come, after all it was Sunday, so I settled into the cosy seat at the quiet cafe in the middle of town with some coffee and honey. Pondering upon certain thoughts on life I embrace the feeling of happiness. I have learnt to recognise it, and be grateful for it. A dream I once had misted to the forefront, and I started drawing lessons from it. In that dream I was she.
She awoke, three a.m sleepless.There was an urgent need to get somewhere, she just didn't know where so the urgency, was at the surface of all her thoughts keeping her sleepless so she rose and drew herself a hot bath. Running downstairs to turn on the coffee machine she brew herself a strong cup while waiting for the bath to fill up. Carrying the hot cup of black liquid upstairs into the bathroom she felt the urgency once again. The direction which she needed to head was clear and so she made concrete the decision that was a-floating. She would start on the journey today. In the hot tub, sipping the hot cup of coffee she soaked in every possible good in the moment before getting up, drying off and getting dressed. She pulled on her t-shirt and shorts and pulled the jersey over her to keep warm. She grabbed her bag, and stuffed all she thought she needed into it, grabbed her keys and headed into the kitchen. She filled a quarter of her thermos with hot coffee and topped it up with steaming hot milk, grabbed a bag of apples, and a bag of bread and headed out the door. She waited while the garage door rolled up and started the engine of her brand new car. She laid down the stuff in her arms on the passenger seat and looked on her shoe rack for the perfect pair of shoe. She pottered until she found them, leaned on her car and pulled up the pair of brown ugs. Perfect for the journey.
She drove on at a consistent speed and she felt the urgency lift as she headed towards the highway. She picked up and dropped off a few hitchhikers, who entertained her with a few interesting conversations that kept her journey interesting and night fell. She drove through the night, and day, finished her coffee and felt the need to stock up on the caffeine, and empty her bladder. She drove into the next town and pulled into an empty parking lot and walked into the cosy little cafe to fill her tummy, afterwhich she headed towards the washroom.
The washroom was located in a singular bungalow at the corner of the road outside which sat rows and rows of shoeracks filled with shoes. Shoes of all shapes, sizes and colours. She removed her ugs and placed them at the corner, took the tag indicating the rack number to remind her of where she had parked her boots, and entered the bungalow. She was immediately greeted with chaos and busyness. She was greeted by a few people, stopped to chat to another bunch, and eventually she was lost in her rest-stop. When she finally arrived at the cubicle, she emptied her bladder and then proceeded to brush her teeth when the urgency hit her again, reminding her of that long journey she still had before her. Panicking she washed her face and tried to find her way back out to the shoe rack. The chaos that greeted her on her way in surrounded her as she found her way to the door where she was immediately overwhelmed with anxiety. She had to find her shoes.
She started down the racks and racks of shoes she realised she did not know what she was looking for. She had forgotten which shoes she had on, so she decided to try on every single pair, with the hope of finding the perfect fit, for her journey. Pair after pair, and day turned to night thrice, and by the fourth day she had begun losing all hope of finding the perfect pair. When she finally stopped she realised. She had spent all week changing shoes. Standing in despair, not knowing what to do next, for she couldn't possibly leave without shoes, she sat on the ground and folded her legs. In her tiredness she fell asleep, and had a dream. And in that dream she was, she.
And in that dream, she was changing shoes, and whilst changing shoes she was greeted by a little old woman who pointed in the direction of the perfect pair. Her own boots. She shook herself awake, reached into her pockets and pulled out the tag that indicated where she had parked the perfect pair. Her own boots. With such relief she pulled them on and walked back out to her car, and continued her journey down in the right direction. She drove on, and the urgency lifted. She didn't know where she was going, but she knew that she was going in the right direction, and she had her own shoes.
I found myself awake, three a.m not knowing whether she arrived at her destination, or whether she ever detoured. But I know this, I had spent a portion of my life changing shoes. I walked down to pour myself a cup of hot milk when I looked out the window, where a little old lady waved at me, and smiled. I reached into my pockets and pulled out the tag that indicated where I had parked my perfect pair of shoes. I smiled. I will be putting on the perfect pair of shoes before getting into my car later that morning. And I will be going in the right direction, that I am sure. The solitude around me was immaterial, I was comfotably busy in my shoes, headed in the right direction. No one in that singular bungalow would be able to steer me any other. I had my own destination to reach.
And I am not going to be needing to change shoes. No more.
